This is What We Do!

Reminder: Early Intervention staff try to protect the health of all children involved in our program.  To help us do this, please reschedule your appointment if anyone in your home is ill.  Thank you for your help in keeping kiddos healthy.

This article is a great summary of how to play with your child.  Hopefully, you recognize some of these suggestions as things you have heard from your service providers!  Thanks to Nicole Walker, one of our Speech/Language Specialists, for finding and submitting this article from KSL.com.

Harnessing the Power of Play with Your Child

 SALT LAKE CITY — Are you the type of parent who prefers rough and tumble play with your child or working together on artwork? Something in between?

Regardless of what style of play you prefer, folding in some play therapy techniques can offer long-lasting benefits.

Play therapists relying on the evidenced-based practice of child-directed play use letting the child lead, the sportscaster technique, limiting “teaching moments” and the use of labeled praise to improve relationships.

Dr. Gary Landreth and Dr. Sheila Eyberg pioneered child-directed play therapy. It's use focuses on improving the parent-child relationship as a means to improve the child's behavior. These techniques are typically used with children ages 2 through 7.

Researchers have long known that a good parent-child relationship (sometimes called a secure attachment) has lasting effects. Children in preschool and elementary school who have a history of secure attachment continually exceed their peers in regards to competency, empathy, feelings identification, social skills and self-confidence.

Child-directed play seeks to strengthen this relationship. But these techniques don't need to be reserved for play therapy only. What parent isn't interested in instilling more self-confidence or empathy in their child?

Let the child lead

Child-directed play is most effective when used with games that involve imagination, or at least those without rules. For example, board games aren't amenable to child-directed play, but any type of artwork, role-playing games, blocks, games using figurines (animals, dolls) work perfect. If you see your child is engaged in this type of play, join them, but let them be the director.

The pace of a child's play can be slower than adults are used to, so be patient. Sit back and use behavioral descriptions (explained below) as a way to participate. If they want you to join them, ask “which animal should I be?” Resist the urge to make suggestions or impact the direction of play. This is a role reversal for parents and children, and when it's in a safe, contained environment, let your child be the guide.

Act as a sportscaster

One way to let children know what they are doing is important to you is to use the sportscaster technique. This means using behavioral descriptions. Narrate your child's play as it's happening. Say “you choose to use the pink crayon.” Or “I noticed you are really focused on making a circle.” This communicates to children that what they are doing matters and that you are present with them. As adults this would bother us, and we'd question why someone was narrating our every move, but you'll be surprised how much your child eats it up.

Abandon your instinct to “teach”

Rather than jumping in during blocks and asking questions such as “what color is this block?” or “how many red blocks do you see,” focus on observing behavior and describing it. This is easier said than done. Many parents use every opportunity to teach their children. During this time, the focus is on letting the child direct the interactions.

Use labeled praise

We are quick to praise our children, but try using labeled praise — meaning specific, descriptive praise. For example, “I like the way you didn't give up when you were frustrated” rather than “good work.” When joining your child in play, look for opportunities to point out good decisions they've made, creative problem solving or examples of pro-social choices. By using labeled praise, children will gain a greater understanding of what your expectations are.

Additionally, when you are closely observing your child, it's easier to pick out what you are impressed with and give your child feedback rather than when you are distracted by your to-do list.

Play is the language children use to communicate their feelings. By using some of these techniques with your child, you may be privy to subtleties that are easily overlooked. Channel your inner child and enjoy.

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Whitney Barrell, LCSW, has a master's of social work from the University of Utah. In her private practice she enjoys working with children and families on myriad mental health issues.

Read more at http://www.ksl.com/?nid=1009&sid=28553438#tDXPtRK3dLp4w23Z.99

How We Talk to Our Children Matters

Reminder: Early Intervention staff try to protect the health of all children involved in our program.  To help us do this, please reschedule your appointment if anyone in your home is ill.  Thank you for your help in keeping kiddos healthy.

This article from the University of Washington was submitted by Emily Farr, Speech/Language Specialist.  How you talk to your little one makes a difference in how quickly and how large their vocabulary grows!

Babbling Babies - Responding to One-on-One "Baby Talk" - Master More Words

Common advice to new parents is that the more words babies hear the faster their vocabulary grows. Now new findings show that what spurs early language development isn’t so much the quantity of words as the style of speech and social context in which speech occurs.

Researchers at the University of Washington and University of Connecticut examined thousands of 30-second snippets of verbal exchanges between parents and babies. They measured parents’ use of a regular speaking voice versus an exaggerated, animated baby talk style, and whether speech occurred one-on-one between parent and child or in group settings.

“What our analysis shows is that the prevalence of baby talk in one-on-one conversations with children is linked to better language development, both concurrent and future,” said Patricia Kuhl, co-author and co-director of UW’s Institute for Learning & Brain Sciences.

The more parents exaggerated vowels – for example “How are youuuuu?” – and raised the pitch of their voices, the more the 1-year olds babbled, which is a forerunner of word production. Baby talk was most effective when a parent spoke with a child individually, without other adults or children around.

Listen to a mother use baby talk with her child:

“The fact that the infant’s babbling itself plays a role in future language development shows how important the interchange between parent and child is,” Kuhl said.

The findings will be published in an upcoming issue of the journal Developmental Science.

Twenty-six babies about 1 year of age wore vests containing audio recorders that collected sounds from the children’s auditory environment for eight hours a day for four days. The researchers used LENA (“language environment analysis”) software to examine 4,075 30-second intervals of recorded speech. Within those segments, the researchers identified who was talking in each segment, how many people were there, whether baby talk – also known as “parentese” – or regular voice was used, and other variables.

When the babies were 2 years old, parents filled out a questionnaire measuring how many words their children knew. Infants who had heard more baby talk knew more words. In the study, 2-year olds in families who spoke the most baby talk in a one-on-one social context knew 433 words, on average, compared with the 169 words recognized by 2-year olds in families who used the least babytalk in one-on-one situations.

The relationship between baby talk and language development persisted across socioeconomic status and despite there only being 26 families in the study.

“Some parents produce baby talk naturally and they don’t realize they’re benefiting their children,” said first author Nairán Ramírez-Esparza, an assistant psychology professor at the University of Connecticut. “Some families are more quiet, not talking all the time. But it helps to make an effort to talk more.”

Previous studies have focused on the amount of language babies hear, without considering the social context. The new study shows that quality, not quantity, is what matters.

“What this study is adding is that how you talk to children matters. Parentese is much better at developing language than regular speech, and even better if it occurs in a one-on-one interaction,” Ramirez-Esparza said.

Parents can use baby talk when going about everyday activities, saying things like, “Where are your shoooes?,” “Let’s change your diiiiaper,” and “Oh, this tastes goooood!,” emphasizing important words and speaking slowly using a happy tone of voice.

“It’s not just talk, talk, talk at the child,” said Kuhl. “It’s more important to work toward interaction and engagement around language. You want to engage the infant and get the baby to babble back. The more you get that serve and volley going, the more language advances.”

A National Science Foundation Science of Learning Program to the UW-hosted LIFE Center funded the study.

The article can also be found at http://www.washington.edu/news/2014/01/06/babbling-babies-responding-to-one-on-one-baby-talk-master-more-words/

Child Rearing Should be an Olympic Event!

Just when you think you have your little one figured out, she changes!  Even though your child did not come with a manual or a reset button, there are suggestions for toddler discipline.  These "commandments" come from the book Toddler 411 by Denise Fields and Ari Brown, M.D.

1. Use a prevent defense.  Apologies for the football cliche, but this one is easy.  Make your house kid friendly and be realistic about your expectations.  If you take your Swarovski crystal figurine collection off the coffee table, your toddler won't be tempted to fling it at the TV set.  If the family is eating out, go early so you won't have to wait for a table.

2. Don't back down to avoid conflict.  We all hate conflict.  No one wants to be the party pooper.  But you cannot give in merely to avoid having a showdown in the grocery store aisle.  If you decide that your child cannot have the sugar-coated cereal he saw on TV, stick to your guns.  Later you'll be happy you did.

3. Anticipate conflicts.  There are certain times of the day and certain events that are always going to bring about bad behaviors.  Prime suspect #1: transitions from one activity to the next (going to bed, stopping play to eat dinner, etc.).  Give your child a head's up so she is more prepared to make a transition.  "Five minutes and we will be having dinner, Boo Boo."

4. Anticipate attention-seeking behavior.  Yes, your little angel will act up when your attention is diverted (making dinner, talking on the phone, nursing a baby, etc.).  Prepare for this by providing your toddler with some entertainment (a favorite toy, a quick snack, etc.).  True story: my son ate dog food once while I was answering a patient call.  Take home lesson: if you don't provide something for your toddler to do when you are busy, he will . . . and the results may not be pretty.

5. Act immediately.  Don't wait to discipline your child.  He won't remember why he is in trouble more than five minutes after he did the dirty deed.

6. Be consistent.  This is the key to any discipline plan.  When your child knows what is in store when he pulls on the cat's tail, he will stop doing it.  But be aware that it may take numerous "lessons" to eliminate that undesirable behavior.

7. Pick your battles.  Saying "No" twenty times a day loses its effectiveness.  Prioritize behaviors into large ones, medium ones, and those too insignificant to bother with.  In Starbucks terms, there are toddler Venti, Grande, and Tall screw-ups.

8. Make your comments short and sweet.  Speak in short sentences such as "No hitting."  This is much more effective than, "Chaz, you know it's not nice to hit the dog."  Believe us, you lost Chaz right after "you know."

9. Focus on the behavior, not the child.  Be sure to state that a particular behavior is bad.  NEVER tell your child that HE is bad.

10.  Remind your child that you love her.  It's always good form to end your discussion with a positive comment.  This shows your child you are ready to move on and not dwell on the problem.  It also reinforces the reason you are setting limits - because you love her.

11. Don't yell.  But change your voice.  It's not the volume, but the tone of your voice that gets your point across.  Remember The Godfather?  He never needed to yell.

12. Show respect.  Use active listening and don't interrupt.  And whatever you do, don't laugh.

13.  Be a good role model.  If you are calm under pressure, your child will take the cue.  And if you have a temper tantrum when you are upset, expect that your child will do the same.  He's watching you, always watching.

14. Catch your child being good.  Praising good behavior reduces the amount of attention-seeking bad behavior that you will see.  Think of praise as fertilizer for that super-ego.

15. Use age-appropriate and temperament-appropriate techniques.  No matter how much advice we give you, you have to tailor it to your own child.  And what worked at 15 months won't work when your child is two.  He's read your play books and watched the films.  You have to adjust your strategy over time.

16.  Don't treat your child like an adult.  Your child really doesn't want to hear a lecture from you.  Nor does he understand it.  Much as you would like to have a man-to-man talk, so to speak, it won't work; so don't waste your time or energy.  but toddlers do understand consequences.  Next time your toddler throws his spaghetti on the wall, don't break into the "You Can't Throw Your Food" lecture.  Calmly evict him from the kitchen for the night.

17. Lower your expectations.  A lot of parent frustration stems from setting the bar too high.  If you expect less from your child, you'll be pleasantly surprised when you get more. (The follow up to this one is the chapter on Developmental Milestones).

18.  Take emotion out of the equation.  We give kudos to Dr. Thomas Phelan, author of the book, 1-2-3 Magic for pointing out parents' two biggest mistakes: "Too much talking, too much emotion."  Your kids enjoy the fight.  If your toddler can get you to raise your voice and stomp your feet, he has just won Round One.  The less you react and talk during an intervention, the better.  (It feels really empowering, by the way, when you don't get sucked in - probably because your blood pressure isn't sky high).

19. Don't negotiate or make false promises.  This isn't Capitol Hill, it's your living room.  Avoid hearing yourself say, "If you behave, I will buy you that doll you want."  We'd never suggest that you resort to this tactic.  Otherwise, you'll create a three-year old whose good behavior will always come with a price tag. Think Veruca Salt from Charlie & The Chocolate Factory.

20.  Remember to take a step back.  Don't get sucked into the vortex.  Instead, take a longer view of what is happening.  You'll have a better idea of what manipulative behaviors your child is using and get a fresh perspective on how to change your approach.

February Community Activities

Take advantage of the activities in your community to get out of the house and enjoy your family.  All activities are free unless indicated.

The last free day at Hogle Zoo this season!  Wednesday, February 26th from 9:00 am to 4:00 pm.

Tracy Aviary is offering Wild Wednesdays with Free Admission every Wednesday in November through March. Note that there is a $1 conservation fee per person, sponsored in part by Salt Lake County Zoo, Arts & Parks

Family Valentine's Dance on Friday February 14th from 7:00 to 9:30 pm at Central Davis Junior High gym.  Live music by the local band "Mid-Life Crisis", refreshments, prize giveaways and a sweetheart photobooth.

VITA - Volunteer Income Tax Assistance is available at several locations.  If you earn $52,000 or less per year you may qualify.  Follow the link for a list of days, times and locations to access this service.
http://irs.treasury.gov/freetaxprep/jsp/vita.jsp?zip=84025&lat=40.9698029&lng=-111.91647790000002&radius=25

Utah Easy to Love Davis County Group meets on February 19th at 7:15pm at 1246 Flint Meadows Dr. #102, Kaysville. Child care is available for $5/child.  RSVP's are required to reserve a child care spot.  For more information, look under the 'Child Care' tab on the website utaheasytolove.org.  You can also contact Jen & Lindsay at 801 532-4331 or at utaheasy2love@gmail.com.

If you know of any other activities in your community, please leave a comment!